NON-COMMITTAL BLURBS FOR SOFT-HEARTED OR WEAK-WILLED BOOK REVIEWERS:

 

• "If it takes a million monkeys a million years to write the complete works of Shakespeare, then this book would only require seventeen monkeys and a week and a half, which is a hell of a lot more humane if you ask me."
  
  
• "Makes Valley of the Dolls look like a slightly-abridged version of the same."
  
  
• "A book like this comes along every once in a while."
  
  
• "Adventure has a new name, though we still refer to it as 'Adventure' to minimize confusion."
  
  
• "Brings new meaning to the term 'adequate binding'!"
  
  
• "A devastating work of fiction, particularly if dropped in great numbers from a sufficient height."
  
  
• "The finest book with that particular title published so far this year, at least that I'm aware of."
  
  
• "Indispensable, judging by the size of most of the dispensers I've seen."
  
  
• "From first sentence to last, this book keeps them in the correct order."
  
  
• "I've been waiting a long time for a book to finally rip the lid off the confectionery industry, snap damp towels of invective at its soft white underbelly, and expose the dark, infernal machinations of its convoluted infrastructure for all and sundry to see. Has it come in yet?" 
• "I can sum this book up in two words."